How to Answer the Are You Interviewing Elsewhere Interview Question

graphic of two people interviewing over a table with a resume and the word interview.

A friend recently shared his perspective on a recent interview experience. He was particularly unsure of how to correctly answer the question of, “are you interviewing with others and do you have any offers?”

Used to gauge interest

This question is theoretically trying to gauge your interest in the job, your competitiveness as a candidate and your level of commitment to the company.  As both an interviewer and interviewee, I hate this question. By asking this question, this way, the interview quickly becomes awkward and uncomfortable.

Specifically, as an interviewer, I know I’m not getting the answer to the question I really want to ask, which is, “if we think you’re the best person for the job are we possibly going to lose you to another organization.”

Since I seem to be in the minority in this space and interviewers almost add this on as an afterthought to all interviews, my traditional answers are below. Now, obviously, this is career field dependent and there may be other factors involved, so take that into consideration when reviewing my usual answers.

Suggested Answers

If I am interviewing with other companies, I usually say something like, “My skills and experience are sought after and I am engaged in the interview process with a few other organizations. Ultimately, I’m looking for the best fit for my career goals in a supportive organization that has room for me to continue to grow as a leader and advance my skills.” You may want to bring it back to this particular position by customizing the bolded words if the interviewer asks this question to gauge how quickly they need to move in an offer to you. Use the other clues from the interview and any timeline they discussed.

On one hand, this response lets you indicate you are competitive and may make you more desirable to the interviewer and organization but it could also backfire, which is why I also advise to never lie.

If I am not interviewing with other companies, my typical answer is,  “I am actively seeking an opportunity that aligns with my career goals in a supportive organization that has room for me to continue to grow as a leader and advance my skills.” Again, customize the bolded words as you can to bring it back to the position and organization.

I hope this helps!

Bonus advice

When asking questions of the interview, find a way to ask a question along the lines of how important it is to you that this role be taken by someone with [skill you have such as eye for details, ability to manage multiple projects, etc.], ideally before the interview asks about other interviews.

I’m a Hiring Manager, and I Always Read Cover Letters — 3 Reasons Why You Should Include Them (Guest Post on Fairy God Boss)

Typeriter on pink background with the words Dear Hiring Manager,

As a hiring manager, if your resume and cover letter make it past the algorithm, I want to see that you can write. I want to learn more about why my organization over anywhere else is where you want to work. I want to see if your skills are a good fit beyond what your resume indicates.

That means I actually read your cover letter.

A supervisor once explained it to me this way: “I can teach a candidate how to use the tools to do the job, but I can’t teach the candidate how to write, get along with people or be curious.”

In a successful cover letter — that starts with why this job and this organization specifically — you are telling me you are not only looking for the title associated with the position but at my organization, which makes me curious and inclined to look closer at what you would bring to the role.

Here’s Why You Should Always Include a Cover Letter

1. You can show your potential employer what kind of employee you are.

Writing well is a skill that takes time, practice and a dedicated process. Often this tells me quickly what kind of employee the applicant may be. If the cover letter is full of run-on sentences, rife with typos and other mistakes, it will give me pause and make me look closer at other performance indicators.

A rushed cover letter isn’t an outright dealbreaker, but it does tell me the candidate didn’t take the time to proofread.

2. It’s a chance to brag about yourself.

A cover letter is an opportunity to showcase big wins and provide additional details about how and why you are the best person to do the job you are applying to do. If you can quantify this information, do so. Being able to share numbers even in a generalized way indicates you are able to quantify your work.

Use the space to highlight objectives achieved and goals accomplished with specifics. Providing details on the results of your work, even if you only had a small part in an overall project tells me you care about what happens after your work leaves your hands.

Better yet, tell me how you impacted your current employer and your designated goals and objectives. Did a process change because you observed an issue? Did you catch a small error before it turned into a bigger error? Did your work help your organization achieve a goal on time and on budget?

3. You get to prove that you’re the right person to join this team.

With your cover letter, you also have the opportunity to indicate you would be a good team and culture fit. My favorite cover letters tell me how the candidate made their current organization, team or process better. Maybe you revamped the script you use when answering the phone to be more conducive for routing the calls to the right person more quickly. Maybe you initiated a task tracking system for yourself or your team to better keep track of who is working on what, when. You have likely done more than your job description and a cover letter is a great time to expound on those job duties.

How to Write a Cover Letter Every Hiring Manager Wants to Read

At a loss for how to start crafting a cover letter hiring managers want to read? Find your current job description or rewrite your current job description.

Want to read the rest? You can view the full post on Fairy God Boss.

Image is everything

Editor’s Note: Here at Dispatches, we are always looking for ways to help our readers do things. For some of our readers, that means helping navigate the working world, for others, it means assisting in the ever challenging question,“ what’s for dinner?” For still others, it means figuring out how to balance family life with everything else. In an effort to aid in all of these endeavors, we have collaborated on this article written specifically for our readers.

In the business world, your image is everything. How your customers perceive you and your company will go a long way towards whether they choose you – or your competitors. 

Dress the partFirst of all, think about how you and your teams are presenting yourselves – and put yourselves in your customer’s shoes. Given a choice, which business would you choose to work with? The one with employees that dress inappropriately or untidily, or the ones that take pride in their appearance? A professional look – no matter what industry you are in – will always win over the messier, untidier competition.

The importance of clean vehiclesIt’s not just clothing that is important. Let’s say you are a tradesperson, which makes their living by driving to and from customer’s houses in a white Fiat Doblo or Mercedes Sprinter. You have to remember that your van is one of the biggest selling points of your business. If it looks dirty, messy, and covered in grime, what sort of impression does this give off? Investing in something like Mercedes Sprinter Van racking systems will help you keep things tidy out back. Regular cleaning will keep your van sparkling white. And it’s also a good idea to invest in some prominent signage – it’s a great way to advertise your trade and service.

A great websiteMany people first come across your business via the Internet these days, so your online presence needs to be as sharp as your physical presence. Simplicity, usability, and professional design are all critical factors, and it is worth working with a professional designer to ensure you have the right pieces of the jigsaw.


An industry authorityWhatever your business, it’s always vital to be seen as someone who knows what they are doing. Becoming an industry authority makes it clear to prospective customers that you can be trusted to do the job they want to pay you for. Try creating a blog for your website and write about relevant and helpful information for your customers. Also, encourage people to leave reviews of your business – it gives a sense of social proof.

Professional documentsMake sure that all documents, contracts, receipts, and invoices are professionally presented to customers and suppliers alike. It’s such as simple thing that can give confidence to people they are making the right choice. Make sure your written communications are professional, too – silly spelling or grammar mistakes can tarnish your business. Use spell checks and proofread every single document that you use for your business

A friendly, can-do attitudeFinally, make sure you treat all your customers in a courteous, friendly, and engaging way. A warm smile can make all the difference. It’s such a simple idea – and so easy to do – yet few businesses manage to get it right every time.  

Federal Jury Duty

Jury Duty Certificate
Earlier this week I had the opportunity to serve as a federal juror. I will freely admit I was apprehensive and worried about what kind of impact my potential jury service would have on my toddler and my family. I am extremely lucky that I didn’t have to worry about my job or not earning any income during my service, unlike other potential jurors. Turns out, I didn’t need to be overly concerned or stressed.

Overall serving as a federal juror was interesting, enlightening and kind of fun. I was happy to have served and appreciated the opportunity to participate in the legal process.  I was surprised at how out of body the whole experience felt. The lights in the courtroom are both bright and dim, the white noise from the ceiling, the intense concentration and the strict instructions were a lot to take in all at once.

I was very impressed with the judge in my case. He handled the court extremely well and was thorough and clear in his instructions. I was less impressed with the legal counsel on both side, but I surmise that may have been because neither side expected the case to go to trial. I could be wrong, but that was my overall impression.

In truth, I arrived about three minutes late the first day because traffic on the bridge was diverted and then I got lost trying to find the U.S. District Court House (which is not the Missouri Supreme Court as one very kind construction worker pointed me to). Luckily I found it, the elusive visitor parking lot and wasn’t the last to arrive.

Wearing black leggings, a black knit dress and a blue cardigan, I was in the top 10 dress wise. I was surprised at what people would wear to a federal court. One woman was dressed in workout clothes and had to be freezing. I am guessing some of these people thought they wouldn’t be picked based on their attire.

We waited in the Jury Assembly room and a clerk told us what she knew, which was that this current trial would last about two or three days.

At 9 a.m. we all went up to the fourth floor. At least 15 of us were crammed into one elevator on the way up. When we reached fourth floor, we were lined up randomly and given cards with our juror number up to 35, I was 8.

That meant I got to sit in the jury box. The judge came in and swore us in as potential jurors and began the vior dire. He asked initially asked us to go through the following questions on the back of our numbered cards:

  • Name
  • County of residence
  • Time in residence of county
  • Marital status
  • Children
  • Education
  • Occupation
  • Spouse occupation

After those questions the judge asked us other questions such as if any of us have close friends or family members who are in law enforcement, have we ever been victims of a crime, connections with drugs or drug activity, do we have any legal training or close friends or family members with training, etc. These questions took about an hour and a half.I disclosed both my media training and that a relative has a paralegal certificate.

Then we took a short recess and came back about 20 minutes later. At that point, the judge asked his final questions about law enforcement, legal connections, crime and drugs.

About a third of the potential jurors had a close friend or family member work in law enforcement or in a legal capacity and more than a third had been a crime victim or a close friend or family member had been a crime victim. Another third had some connections with illegal drugs. I thought everyone was respectful and each potential juror was given the opportunity to conference with the judge without the rest of the jury pool hearing. I appreciated the dignity that the judge offered each of us.

One of the questions the judge asked that was most interesting was, “Is there anything you aren’t telling me because you don’t think you’ll be picked as a juror?” This is when I raised my card to mention coordination of child care. The judge was kind and considerate and understanding.

It was really interesting to hear how 38 people from different counties had differences and similarities. The education levels went from a certificate of eighth-grade completion to multiple PhDs. I was surprised at how many people had connections to crime victims or had connections with illegal drugs.

Mostly I was heartened by the civility. Everyone was kind and everyone was respectful. It appeared no one outright tried to get our of jury duty, though a few people were adamant that they could not be impartial, which wasn’t without merit. Everyone laughed at the few jokes and were appropriately somber when necessary.

We were called back before lunch. That’s when it started to feel like an elementry school gym class. I very much wanted to be picked. I had overheard a clerk mention that there were other upcoming cases that would be several weeks long and given that we were selected for federal jury service, I guessed those might be more in the murder, assault and those kinds of cases, which I wouldn’t be a good fit for impartiality.

I was happy to be picked fourth and asked to sit in the jury box. Then we took a recess for lunch and when we returned the trial began.

One of the things the judge emphasized heavily was not to let sympathies or bias impact out judgement. Additionally, he emphasized how the questions or the statements made by counsel could not be considered in our deliberation. Yet, the defense tried to play on our sympathies on more than one occasion.

I was surprised at how unpolished both attorneys were in the courtroom. I didn’t expect a Law and Order level of finesse, but the defense counsel seemed flustered a few times and didn’t seem to be able to get his footing. Again, my best guess is because neither the defense or the prosecution expected this case to go to trial. I am not suggesting that counsel was unprepared or did not serve the best interest of the government or the defendant, more that it was more harried than portrayed in Law and Order type television shows.

There were also a few little mistakes that seemed out-of-place. For example, the prosecution didn’t enter a piece of evidence into the record and had to enter it after the witness had discussed it. The prosecution also didn’t ask a witness to spell their last name despite the court asking them to do so.

One piece of evidence was a video, but the audio was difficult to hear and the clarity wasn’t good enough to read lips. The prosecutor had a hard time playing the video back when the computer went to sleep and faded to black though the audio continued to play. He did not hide his frustration with the program.

As an aside, the white noise the judge used when counsel approached the bench is the exact same noise we use for our toddler’s sleep machine and it was making me sleepy on more than one occasion.

The judge asked the jury to step out a few times and each time I was grateful I’d brought some reading material in the form of a few magazines and books (though I actually over-packed). A few other jurors commented on it. I was surprised no one else brought anything.

There isn’t a clock in the jury room and most often just the hum of the refrigerator. It’s awkward for those uncomfortable with silence.

At about 4:15 p.m. the judge recessed us until the following day at 9 a.m. He reiterated that since there were only 12 of us, we all had to return. He noted that the recess wasn’t just for bridge traffic and child care, but because if we had gone to deliberation, the entire courthouse would have had to stay open, which he wasn’t willing to do. I appreciated the judge’s candor and consideration for the additional stressors of the bridge construction and added commute time. After the trial, I expressed my appreciation to the judge and fellow jurors.

One of the judges instructions was in regard to the elevator and how we shouldn’t “pass the time with any counsel” (which means even small talk) for the appearance of remaining impartial. After we were recessed, another juror and I were walking behind some witnesses and would have ended up in the elevator with them. As this might make for an awkward situation, we decided to brave te stairs, only got a little lost. But it prevented us from seeming partial. It may have been a step too far, but at least the other juror and I know not to take the stairs again.

When we returned the next morning, we received our final instructions from the judge and then heard closing arguments.

This is again, where it seemed like both counselors were not as rehearsed as they might have others been. Closing arguments were limited to 10 minutes and the prosecution overran that limit. The defense, however, misspoke and actually said, “I hope you find the defendant guilty.” He then had to walk that statement back and correct himself. I’m sure the other jurors facial expressions mirrored my own.

I found myself thinking about how long I watched the reactions of the judge, the counselors and the defendant. I tried not to overtly stare or hold eye contact. I also was cognizant of RBF and smiling too much.

Once we were sent to deliberation, the first thing we needed to do was elect a foreperson. I was happy someone else spoke up as wanting to serve in that capacity. I would have volunteered, but am glad someone else did instead. I ended up taking notes on the whiteboard. I needed to process some of the information visually and a few other jurors mentioned afterward how they appreciated it.

I was surprised that when we all voted on the counts how we voted unanimously right away, but even then we spent quite a bit of time talking it through and making sure everyone was comfortable with the verdict. We all reached the same conclusion differently and each found different aspects of the evidence to be the most relevant. I was thoroughly impressed with my fellow jurors and appreciated hearing how they reached their vote.

Ultimately, we returned to court to share the verdict. The judge read it and entered it into the record. Then it was over.

The judge was kind enough to come back to the jury room to hand out our certificates and answer questions. Again, I was impressed with the judge and how he answered our questions.

Some general takeaways:

  • Dress professionally, but comfortably.
  • Bring something to read (iPads and Nooks are electronic and therefore not allowed in federal court)
  • Bring a snack (granola bar, apple, etc) the breaks are generous but the food options are often limited


My child is not a doll and how we handle gender questions

When A was a little over two months old, I posted this:
My child is not a dollThat sparked quite the conversation on Facebook. At the time, she was not at all interested in onesies. She fought J and I each time we tried to put one on her. Then after watching me pull a blown out onesie off over her feet, J discovered that we could also put the onesies on that way too. Let that sink in for a minute, because it was LIFE CHANGING for us. From then on we could dress her in onesies and she wouldn’t scream.

My daughter is not a doll

Fast forward four more months and A is now super mobile (rolling and army crawling and pulling herself to standing) J and I are even more aware of what we dress her in. If you haven’t read this post from Willow Mom, please do. It sums up how we feel in the most articulate way.

You won’t be seeing A in super frilly dresses, except for the occasional church outfit, like this one for Easter. She wore it for all of two hours and had three blow outs.
Frilly Dress

We, like Willow Mom, will follow this advice from The Bump and dress our daughter in outfits she can move in and that won’t be ruined if she has a blow out. As we are also nearing the summer months, we will be opting for outfits of breathable material that won’t stick to her. We will also be dressing her in ways that protect her skin. The carseat gets just as hot as a regular car seats and we don’t want her to get burned because she wore a backless sundress.

Which brings me to the most important part of this post: I am SO TIRED of clothing companies creating baby clothes for girls that inhibit movement, are pink-ified and glittery. It’s like the designers have never met a baby before. If it looks like it would get stuck on a slide or hurt to lay on, I walk right past it. If it’s covered in glitter that will only get in her eyes, I won’t even consider dressing her in it. I want her to know there are more colors than pink. And if she doesn’t want to like pink, she doesn’t have to. My favorite color is blue.

I rarely buy new items for A. We’ve been blessed with lots of hand me downs from friends who have littles bigger than A. That includes boy clothes. Actually, most of the outfits she seems happiest in are boy clothes and pants. (Since most “girl” pants have that stupid ruffle butt.) She does have a few “dresses” that she likes, but if she has a blow out the entire outfit has to change. So we reserve those for special occasions and rarely wear them to school.

With A dressed most often in boy clothes, we are always getting the question of whether she’s a boy or a girl. This doesn’t bother us in any way, but it does make other people uncomfortable. So I’ve developed a trick. When someone continuously refers to A as a boy, I find a way to add in something like, “silly girl! Where did your headband (or hair bow) go!” Most often, that does the trick.

It’s interesting to me how not knowing if she’s a boy or a girl by looking at her makes people uncomfortable. Then when some people find out she is a girl, they get irritated that we didn’t dress her to be easily identifiable as a girl. I’ve talked to moms of boys and somehow they don’t encounter the same thing. I’m sure there’s a psychology experiment to be done about this.

Where's your headband?

Now, don’t get me started on older ladies (and younger ones!) accosting me in the grocery store…