Now that we’ve established asking for help is important, let me delve into how not to ask for help. I strongly believe it is all in the approach and word choice.
Asking nicely is beyond just saying please and thank you. It is using an appropriate tone and not talking down to the person. Remember you are asking for their help and you should do so in a way that makes them WANT to help you.
I often get asked to redo and change things, which I am happy to do and not just because it is part of my job or because the client asked for it. When some people ask it is polite and with direction, others a completely different story.
Sometimes, I leave a conversation in which I am rudely directed to make changes feeling angry. The person speaks as if what I had initially done wasn’t good enough. It probably wasn’t, but there is no need to treat me that way. Abrasiveness is never respectful and always comes across as just plain mean. I find myself dreading working on their project and the energy is dead.
Others, who are more gentle and persuasive in their wording and tone, makes me feel excited and like we’re on the same page. I can’t wait to work on their project.
How do you handle abrasive requests?